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Don Zolidis
Bio and play details
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Don Zolidis is a former high school and middle school theatre teacher and is currently a professor of creative writing at Ursinus College. Originally hailing from Wisconsin, Mr. Zolidis received his B.A. in English from Carleton College and an MFA in Playwriting from the Actor's Studio Program at the New School. He has received numerous honors, including the 2004 Princess Grace Award for Playwriting for White Buffalo, now published by Samuel French. His plays have appeared or been workshopped professionally at the Ensemble Studio Theatre, Stage West, Purple Rose Theatre, The Victory Theatre, Bloomington Playwright's Project, Chattyboo Productions, Mirror Stage Company, Impetuous Theatre Group, and New Dramatists.

His plays have had amateur productions in all 50 states and 16 countries and have won numerous state championships.

His screenplays have received numerous prizes, including the 2009 PAGE gold medal for drama, 1st prize in the family division for both the 2008 Screenwriting Expo and 2008 StoryPros Contest and several others. He has one screenplay under option with Will Ferrell's Gary Sanchez Productions and a second in development with an independent producer.

He lives with his wife and his two adorable boys.

Plays by this author
  • Actor's Choice: Monologues for Teens
  • Actor's Choice: Monologues for Women
  • Actor's Choice: Scenes for Teens
  • Alice's Adventures with Poorly Cooked Cafeteria Seafood
  • Anna and August
  • !Artistic Inspiration
  • The Audition
  • The Bells of Charlemont
  • The Bestest Christmas Ever in Texas
  • Billy Shakespeare's Christmas Extravaganza and Traveling Freak Show
  • The Birds: A Modern Adaptation
  • Bobby Wilson Can Eat His Own Face
  • The Brothers Grimm Spectaculathon (full-length)
  • The Brothers Grimm Spectaculathon (one-act)
  • Chemical Bonding (or Better Living through Chemistry)
  • The Christmas Machine
  • The Christmas Tree Thief
  • Clausarella
  • The Craving
  • The Devil in Sherman Marsh
  • Dr. Funk's Christmas Explosion (With Demolition Derby Following)
  • The Elf Rebellion
  • Employees Must Wash Hands... Before Murder
  • Feed the Whales: The Saga of the Boy Band Oreo
  • Gangsta Claus
  • Grandma Remembers Something
  • The Greek Mythology Olympiaganza (full-length)
  • The Greek Mythology Olympiaganza (Iliad! Iliad! Iliad!)
  • The Greek Mythology Olympiaganza (one-act)
  • High School Musi-pocalypse
  • An Honorary Elf
  • It's a Wonderful Magical Miracle on Christmas Street
  • It's not you, it's me
  • Mall Santa Saves the Day
  • The Matchmakers
  • Miss Polly's Institute for Criminally Damaged Young Ladies Puts on a Show
  • The Most Amazing Christmas Play Series in the Entire History of the World
  • The Murderous Mansion of Mr. Uno
  • Oz
  • Revenge of the Gingerbread Boy
  • Santa-Napped
  • Santa vs. The Garden Gnomes
  • The SeussOdyssey (full-length)
  • The SeussOdyssey (one-act)
  • Snappy's Happy Half-Hour
  • Suzie Scrooge
  • A Tiny Miracle with a Fiberoptic Unicorn
  • The Trial of Santa
  • The World's Largest Rodent
  • Play details
    Sorted alphabetically (Sort by popularity)
    Actor's Choice: Monologues for Teens
    by Lucy Alibar, Janet Allard, John Augustine, et al.
    Edited by Erin Detrick
    Foreword by Broadway casting director Kate Schwabe
      More Info Add to Cart

    $14.95 per book

    Looking for the perfect monologue? Actor's Choice: Monologues for Teens is here to help. From hilarious comedy to cutting-edge drama and everything in between, an exciting selection of monologues is at your fingertips. Unlike other monologue books, the source of every monologue is easily accessible -- each play is available through one website (www.playscripts.com), where you can read nearly the entire published script online for free. From classwork to competitions to auditions, this book has you covered!

    Also in this series:
    Actor's Choice: Scenes for Teens
    Actor's Choice: Monologues for Women
    Actor's Choice: Monologues for Men
    "Actor's Choice: Monologues for Teens" by Lucy Alibar, Janet Allard, John Augustine, Will Averill, Brooke Berman, Marisha Chamberlain, Vincent Delaney, Erin Detrick, Jonathan Dorf, Anton Dudley, Tom Dudzick, Stephanie Fleischmann, Matthew Freeman, Alan Haehnel, Barry Hall, Jordan Harrison, Naomi Iizuka, Mrinalini Kamath, Mark D. Kaufmann, Victor Kaufold, Tim Kochenderfer, Gavin Lawrence, Romulus Linney, Wendy MacLeod, Michael Marks, Timothy Mason, Lucinda McDermott, Winter Miller,
    Reviews
    "This is an excellent monologue book for middle and high school students with applications for competition as well as use in drama, speech, or English classes."
    --Terrilyn Fleming, The Midwest Book Review


    Actor's Choice: Monologues for Women
    by Liz Duffy Adams, Robert Alexander, John Augustine, et al.
    Edited by Erin Detrick
    Foreword by Broadway casting director Kate Schwabe
      More Info Add to Cart

    $14.95 per book

    Discover a monologue book like no other. Actor's Choice: Monologues for Women gives you an extraordinary array of cutting-edge new monologues, from comedic to dramatic and everything in between. Unlike other monologue books, the source of every monologue is easily accessible -- each play is available through one website (www.playscripts.com), where you can read nearly the entire published script online for free. Explore the work of today's most celebrated theatrical voices, including Naomi Iizuka, Rinne Groff, Jane Martin, Pulitzer Prize winners Lynn Nottage and David Lindsay-Abaire, and many more!

    Also in this series:
    Actor's Choice: Monologues for Men
    Actor's Choice: Monologues for Teens
    Actor's Choice: Scenes for Teens
    "Actor's Choice: Monologues for Women" by Liz Duffy Adams, Robert Alexander, John Augustine, Stephen Belber, Brooke Berman, Adam Bock, Sheila Callaghan, James Christy, Bill Corbett, Lisa D'Amour, Tom Dudzick, Catherine Filloux, Thomas Gibbons, Joseph Goodrich, Kirsten Greenidge, Rinne Groff, Barry Hall, Jordan Harrison, Jeffrey Hatcher, Hilly Hicks, Jr., Naomi Iizuka, Jeffrey M. Jones, Robert Kerr, Seth Kramer, Carson Kreitzer, David Lindsay-Abaire, Larry Loebell, Deb Margolin,


    Actor's Choice: Scenes for Teens
    by Liz Duffy Adams, Janet Allard, Yuri Baranovsky, et al.
    Edited by Jason Pizzarello
    With "Tips for Student Actors" by director Jon Jory
      More Info Add to Cart
    Coming Soon
    Royalty fee TBD
    Books are not yet available for this title. Click here for more details.


    Alice's Adventures with Poorly Cooked Cafeteria Seafood
    by Don Zolidis
      More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy
    Short, 40-50 minutes
    3 females, 3 males, 6 either
    (12-22 actors possible: 3-18 females, 3-18 males)
    $40.00 per performance; $7.99 per book

    Between her genius little brother forcing her to play Dungeons and Dragons with his weird friend and scoring detention with the meanest teacher in the school, Alice is having the worst day imaginable. Hoping to get herself sent to the hospital, she eats as much mystery fish as possible from the cafeteria. What follows is a bizarre series of hallucinations that have a suspicious resemblance to another famous Alice story...
    "Alice's Adventures with Poorly Cooked Cafeteria Seafood" by Don Zolidis. Alice's Adventures with Poorly Cooked Cafeteria Seafood, Ozark Jr. High School, Ozark, Missouri (2008).


    Anna and August by Don Zolidis   More Info Add to Cart
    Romantic comedy
    Short, 40-50 minutes
    3 females, 3 males (4-8 actors possible: 2-4 females, 2-4 males)
    $35.00 per performance; $7.99 per book

    Anna is the smartest girl in the school. She's also a purple belt in Tae Kwon Do and has a devastating punch. Strangely enough, she has trouble meeting boys. Except one: August, who seems to appreciate her weirdness. Unfortunately, the course of weird love never did run smooth.
    "Anna and August" by Don Zolidis. Anna and August, Haltom High School, Haltom City, Texas (2009).


    !Artistic Inspiration by Don Zolidis   More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy
    Short, 35-40 minutes
    5 either (5-26 actors possible: 0-26 females, 0-26 males)
    $40.00 per performance; $7.99 per book

    Two basement-dwelling hack writers concoct a scheme to create the most-produceable play in America, which quickly degenerates into a contest to see who can write the worst play imaginable. The hilariously disastrous results range from a "message" play about the dangers of huffing to a Seussian global warming drama about Eskimos. And it gets worse from there.
    "!Artistic Inspiration" by Don Zolidis. !Artistic Inspiration, Haltom High School, Haltom City, Texas (2006).


    The Audition by Don Zolidis   More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy/Drama
    Short, 35-40 minutes
    10 females, 3 males, 11 either
    (13-30 actors possible: 3-25 females, 1-25 males)
    $45.00 per performance; $8.99 per book

    A new theater teacher is bringing a production of A Chorus Line to the high school. Though the hopefuls range from shy to outrageous, and from diva-like to determined, everyone has a chance to step into the spotlight. A hilarious and heartbreaking look at the madness of auditioning and the actors who brave the process for that perfect part.
    "The Audition" by Don Zolidis. The Audition, Oakton High School, Vienna, Virginia (2009).


    The Bells of Charlemont by Don Zolidis   More Info Add to Cart
    Drama
    Short, 40-45 minutes
    2 females, 6 males, 7 either (13-30 actors possible: 2-20 females, 6-20 males)
    $35.00 per performance; $7.49 per book
    Special 17% book discount!

    On Christmas Eve, 1944, a small group of American soldiers are occupying a burned-out village in northern France. The town mayor's widow makes an extraordinary request, asking if they will help revive the town from the crippling malaise of Nazi occupation by restoring a lost Christmas tradition. But before the men can complete their task, they are given orders to join what will become known as the Battle of the Bulge. Will they desert the army to help the people they have come to love? Based on a true story, The Bells of Charlemont beautifully evokes the power of the human spirit in the midst of war.


    The Bestest Christmas Ever in Texas by Don Zolidis   More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy
    Short, 10 minutes
    3 females, 1 male, 1 either (5 actors possible: 3-4 females, 1-2 males)
    $30.00 per performance; $8.99 per book

    NOTE: This play is part of an anthology called Billy Shakespeare's Christmas Extravaganza and Traveling Freak Show.

    Deep in the heart of Texas, Kaylie and Jessie hope for a white Christmas. Their mother, an unabashed cynic, tells them that Texas will never have a white Christmas because global warming is turning the whole world into a desert. So Kaylie and Jessie do the only thing they can do: decide to stop global warming single-handedly. (This play can also be performed as part of the collection Billy Shakespeare's Christmas Extravaganza and Traveling Freak Show.)
    "The Bestest Christmas Ever in Texas" by Don Zolidis. The Bestest Christmas Ever in Texas, Owensboro High School, Owensboro, Kentucky (2005)


    Billy Shakespeare's Christmas Extravaganza and Traveling Freak Show
    by Don Zolidis
      More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy
    Short, 30-40 minutes
    5 females, 6 males, 12 either
    (8-33 actors possible: 3-28 females, 3-26 males)
    $40.00 per performance; $8.99 per book

    NOTE: Each piece in this anthology can be licensed and performed separately.

    A collection of four Christmas-themed short comedies in which elves go on strike, Santa turns gangsta, a shameless huckster attempts to sell the holiday, and two Texas girls try to get their first white Christmas by fighting global warming.

    To purchase this book of 4 plays, click "Add to Shopping Cart" above. To perform an individual play, click on its title below:

  • The Elf Rebellion
  • Gangsta Claus
  • The Christmas Machine
  • The Bestest Christmas Ever in Texas
  • "Billy Shakespeare's Christmas Extravaganza and Traveling Freak Show" by Don Zolidis. The Elf Rebellion, Owensboro High School, Owensboro, Kentucky (2005)


    The Birds: A Modern Adaptation by Don Zolidis
    Based on the original play by Aristophanes
      More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy
    Full-length, 90-100 minutes
    3 females, 7 males, 16 either
    (16-26 actors possible: 3-19 females, 7-23 males)
    $75.00 per performance; $8.99 per book

    Fed up with a world of insurance salesmen and petty problems, two miscreants flee to the kingdom of the birds for a simpler life. While living there, the two scheme up a financial jackpot that could turn the birds' land into a powerful utopia. Their only obstacle: the wrath of the gods. A hilarious and satirical look at politics, religion, and the foolishness of mankind that revives and revamps Aristophanes' classic comedy.
    "The Birds: A Modern Adaptation" by Don Zolidis. The Birds: A Modern Adaptation, North High School, Phoenix, Arizona (2009).


    Bobby Wilson Can Eat His Own Face by Don Zolidis   More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy
    Short, 45-60 minutes
    11 females, 7 males, 2 either
    (10-20 actors possible: 7-16 females, 4-13 males)
    $40.00 per performance; $7.99 per book

    Bobby Wilson has a tough life. His mom doesn't trust him, his little sister is pure evil, and his school life is a disaster. After getting in trouble at school (through no fault of his own) for both sexual harassment and terrorist threats, he decides to do the only thing he can: run away and join a circus freak show.
    "Bobby Wilson Can Eat His Own Face" by Don Zolidis. Bobby Wilson Can Eat His Own Face, Golden West High School, Visalia, California (2005).


    The Brothers Grimm Spectaculathon (full-length)
    by Don Zolidis
      More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy
    Full-length, 100-110 minutes
    1 female, 1 male, 3 either
    (5-43 actors possible: 1-41 females, 1-42 males)
    $75.00 per performance; $9.99 per book

    The fairy tales of the Brothers Grimm are turned on their heads in this fast-paced, rollicking ride as two narrators and several actors attempt to combine all 209 stories ranging from classics like Snow White, Cinderella, and Hansel and Gretel to more bizarre, obscure stories like The Devil's Grandmother and The Girl Without Hands. A wild, free-form comedy with lots of audience participation and madcap fun. (A one-act version of this play is also available.)
    "The Brothers Grimm Spectaculathon (full-length)" by Don Zolidis. The Brothers Grimm Spectaculathon (full-length), McCluer High School, Florissant, Missouri (2009).


    The Brothers Grimm Spectaculathon (one-act)
    by Don Zolidis
      More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy
    Short, 35-50 minutes
    1 female, 1 male, 3 either
    (5-20 actors possible: 1-19 females, 1-19 males)
    $45.00 per performance; $8.99 per book

    Two narrators attempt to recreate all 209 of the fairy tales of the Brothers Grimm in a wild, fast-paced extravaganza. To make it more difficult, they attempt to combine them into one gigantic fable using Rapunzel, Rumpelstiltskin, Hansel and Gretel, Snow White, Sleeping Beauty, Cinderella and other more obscure stories like Lean Lisa and The Devil's Grandmother. (A full-length version of this play is also available.)
    "The Brothers Grimm Spectaculathon (one-act)" by Don Zolidis. The Brothers Grimm Spectaculathon, Duncan Middle School, Duncan, Oklahoma (2009).


    Chemical Bonding (or Better Living through Chemistry)
    by Don Zolidis
      More Info Add to Cart
    Comedic Drama
    Full-length, 110-120 minutes
    15 females, 9 males (18-24 actors possible: 12-15 females, 6-9 males)
    $75.00 per performance; $8.99 per book

    After graduating from high school, class salutatorian Dani is slated to study photography at NYU in the fall and has a summer job working the third shift at a small-town chemical factory. And while her friends are readying for college with road trips and Facebook updates, Dani struggles with her new job, a new relationship, and a serious illness in her family. When Dani starts wondering if she should put off school to figure out what she wants to do with her life, only her eccentric support group of friends and family can persuade her to pursue her dreams.
    "Chemical Bonding (or Better Living through Chemistry)" by Don Zolidis. Chemical Bonding (or Better Living through Chemistry), Haltom High School, Haltom City, Texas (2009).


    The Christmas Machine by Don Zolidis   More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy
    Short, 10 minutes
    2 females, 3 either (5-15 actors possible: 2-15 females, 0-13 males)
    $30.00 per performance; $8.99 per book

    NOTE: This play is part of an anthology called Billy Shakespeare's Christmas Extravaganza and Traveling Freak Show.

    Told in rhyming couplets a la Dr. Seuss, The Christmas Machine is the fanciful story of the Christmas Moo, a shameless huckster who foists his version of Christmas materialism on a small town of unsuspecting innocents. (This play can also be performed as part of the collection Billy Shakespeare's Christmas Extravaganza and Traveling Freak Show.)
    "The Christmas Machine" by Don Zolidis. The Christmas Machine, Owensboro High School, Owensboro, Kentucky (2005)


    The Christmas Tree Thief by Don Zolidis   More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy
    Short, 8-10 minutes
    5 females, 1 male (6 actors possible: 2-6 females, 0-4 males)
    $30.00 per performance; $8.99 per book

    NOTE: This play is part of an anthology called Dr. Funk's Christmas Explosion (With Demolition Derby Following).

    On Christmas Eve, a child from the projects tries to steal a Christmas tree to bring some spirit into her tiny apartment.

    (This play can also be performed as part of the collection Dr. Funk's Christmas Explosion (With Demolition Derby Following).)


    Clausarella by Don Zolidis   More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy
    Short, 10 minutes
    5 females, 1 male, 1 either (7 actors possible: 5-6 females, 1-2 males)
    $30.00 per performance; $8.99 per book

    NOTE: This play is part of an anthology called The Most Amazing Christmas Play Series in the Entire History of the World.

    The new prince of the North Pole is having a ball to find his bride, the new Mrs. Claus, and Clausarella will do anything to get there in this spoof of two famous stories, including dueling fairy godmothers and a prince skilled in the art of extreme ballet.

    (This play can also be performed as part of the collection The Most Amazing Christmas Play Series in the Entire History of the World.)
    "Clausarella" by Don Zolidis. Clausarella, The New Community School, Richmond, Virginia (2008).


    The Craving
    A horrific comedy in two acts
    by Don Zolidis
      More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy
    Full-length, 100-120 minutes
    10 females, 8 males, 9 either
    (14-27 actors possible: 7-19 females, 2-17 males)
    $75.00 per performance; $8.99 per book

    Screenwriter Terry Kyle Morris has just written his first screenplay, a heartwarming emotional journey. His dreams are answered when a big Hollywood studio decides to produce it, but the dream turns into a nightmare as they transform his beautiful script into a zombie slasher flick.
    "The Craving" by Don Zolidis. The Craving, Norwin High School, North Huntington, Pennsylvania (2008).


    The Devil in Sherman Marsh by Don Zolidis   More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy
    Short, 40-50 minutes
    8 females, 6 males, 6 either
    (10-30 actors possible: 3-15 females, 3-20 males)
    $35.00 per performance; $7.99 per book

    Incorrigible nerd Sherman Marsh is tormented by his peers, ignored by his teachers, and shot down by his one true love. His world changes when he discovers a magic Yu-Gi-Oh card which summons a devil to his side. Risking his eternal soul, Sherman makes a wish to ensure his popularity. Unfortunately, deals with supernatural beings rarely turn out as intended. A hilarious modern reimagining of the Faustus story, culminating in an epic collectible card battle.
    "The Devil in Sherman Marsh" by Don Zolidis. The Devil in Sherman Marsh, Belgrade-Brooten-Elrosa High School, Belgrade, Minnesota (2009).


    Dr. Funk's Christmas Explosion (With Demolition Derby Following)
    by Don Zolidis
      More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy
    Short, 35-45 minutes
    10 females, 7 males, 7 either (10-24 actors possible: 5-19 females, 5-19 males)
    $40.00 per performance; $8.99 per book

    NOTE: Each piece in this anthology can be licensed and performed separately.

    The true spirit of Christmas clashes with the modern world in three short, ridiculous comedies. First, in It's a Wonderful Magical Miracle on Christmas Street, an overwhelmed father finds himself trapped in a parody of beloved Christmas movie classics. Then Christmas hypocrisy goes for a spin in Mall Santa Saves the Day, when a volunteer Santa faces consumerism run amok at the shopping complex. And in The Christmas Tree Thief, a young would-be tree-snatcher learns that some of the most valuable gifts are impossible to steal.

    To purchase this book of 3 plays, click "Add to Shopping Cart" above. To perform an individual play, click on its title below:

  • It's a Wonderful Magical Miracle on Christmas Street
  • Mall Santa Saves the Day
  • The Christmas Tree Thief


  • The Elf Rebellion by Don Zolidis   More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy
    Short, 10-15 minutes
    1 female, 4 males, 3 either (8 actors possible: 1-7 females, 1-7 males)
    $30.00 per performance; $8.99 per book

    NOTE: This play is part of an anthology called Billy Shakespeare's Christmas Extravaganza and Traveling Freak Show.

    Three of Santa's elves are fed up with what they consider poor treatment: payment in candy canes, forced labor, and no breaks. After threatening the "big man," they decide to revolt and go on strike. But Santa plays hardball, bringing in midget scabs and other dirty tricks to break their strike. (This play can also be performed as part of the collection Billy Shakespeare's Christmas Extravaganza and Traveling Freak Show.)
    "The Elf Rebellion" by Don Zolidis. The Elf Rebellion, Owensboro High School, Owensboro, Kentucky (2005)


    Employees Must Wash Hands... Before Murder
    by Don Zolidis
      More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy/Murder mystery
    Short, 30-40 minutes
    8 females, 1 male, 10 either
    (14-19 actors possible: 8-11 females, 6-8 males)
    $40.00 per performance; $7.99 per book

    Something is rotten at the Burgatorium, a low-end fast food restaurant...and it's not just the burgers. Hit with a surprise health inspection, employees hilariously rush around to clean up their messes, hide the rats and find real meat for the burgers. But luck is not on their side when their manager turns up dead in a freezer. This super-sized murder mystery comes with a side of funny and a healthy dose of ridiculous as the health inspector and his gangsta intern investigate a lineup of crazy characters that includes a singing tapeworm.
    "Employees Must Wash Hands... Before Murder" by Don Zolidis. Employees Must Wash Hands... Before Murder, Indian Springs Middle School, Keller, Texas (2007).


    Feed the Whales: The Saga of the Boy Band Oreo
    by Don Zolidis
      More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy
    Short, 35-40 minutes
    13 females, 6 males, 1 either
    (14-20 actors possible: 7-17 females, 3-7 males)
    $35.00 per performance; $7.99 per book

    With only two weeks to create a new act for the annual Feed the Whales festival, conniving tour promoter Dr. Bliss strikes upon the easiest band of all to create: a boy band. Unfortunately, putting together a boy band in a town where there don't seem to be any boys is a real problem, and their band consists of a confused plumber, the son of Menudo cast-off, a girl with a fake goatee, and an escaped patient from a mental hospital named Shud who may or may not have burned it down, but is probably a cannibal. Will the newly christened Oreo become a hit? Will Shud eat someone before opening night? A wild and crazy comedy with smooth dance moves and crisp vocals.
    "Feed the Whales: The Saga of the Boy Band Oreo" by Don Zolidis. Feed the Whales: The Saga of the Boy Band Oreo, Ozark Jr. High School, Ozark, Missouri (2009).


    Gangsta Claus by Don Zolidis   More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy
    Short, 10 minutes
    1 female, 3 males, 1 either (5 actors possible: 1-2 females, 3-4 males)
    $30.00 per performance; $8.99 per book

    NOTE: This play is part of an anthology called Billy Shakespeare's Christmas Extravaganza and Traveling Freak Show.

    Deep in the 'hood, a new Santa emerges, one who believes the elves live at Wal-Mart and that the driver of his Escalade, Rudy, is none other than a certain red-nosed reindeer. This ridiculous comedy tells the story of how Gangsta Claus came to be, and traces the curse-like Spirit of Christmas as it zaps from person to person. (This play can also be performed as part of the collection Billy Shakespeare's Christmas Extravaganza and Traveling Freak Show.)


    Grandma Remembers Something by Don Zolidis   More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy
    Short, 10 minutes
    4 females, 1 male (5 actors possible: 3-4 females, 1-2 males)
    $30.00 per performance; $8.99 per book

    NOTE: This play is part of an anthology called The Most Amazing Christmas Play Series in the Entire History of the World.

    Grandma's memory isn't what it used to be. So when she sits down to tell the story of how she and Grandpa got together, there are a few glaring inconsistencies, like flying cars, Abraham Lincoln, and the War of 1812. A hilarious Christmas love story about a woman with a mean right hook.

    (This play can also be performed as part of the collection The Most Amazing Christmas Play Series in the Entire History of the World.)


    The Greek Mythology Olympiaganza (full-length)
    by Don Zolidis
      More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy
    Full-length, 100-120 minutes
    5 females, 5 males, 10 either
    (8-75 actors possible: 1-50 females, 1-50 males)
    $75.00 per performance; $8.99 per book

    Two battling narrators attempt to cover the entirety of Greek mythology using audience participation, cross-dressing, and general theatrical insanity. Famous myths such as Pandora's Box, Jason and the Argonauts (the original Super Friends), and Hercules: Intern God jostle for space with obscure, weird myths such as the myth of Linus and the legend of the Argus. Culminating in a bizarre, musical dance-influenced version of The Iliad complete with a full-scale battle of little green army men, this play is wild, silly, and a complete blast for audiences of all ages. (A one-act version and an Iliad! only version of this play are also available.)
    "The Greek Mythology Olympiaganza (full-length)" by Don Zolidis. The Greek Mythology Olympiaganza, Pinewood Prep, Summerville, South Carolina (2009).


    The Greek Mythology Olympiaganza (Iliad! Iliad! Iliad!)
    by Don Zolidis
      More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy
    Short, 20-25 minutes
    6 females, 6 males (6-50 actors possible: 3-25 females, 3-25 males)
    $40.00 per performance; $7.99 per book

    Complete with little green army men, a beauty pageant, and warring narrators, this is The Iliad as you've never seen it before. Two narrators have a blast recreating Homer's quintessential epic myth at a rapid pace and in wildly varying styles, as it morphs seamlessly from a musical, a modern drama, and a bizarre one-man show. This side-splitting parody is both hysterical and historical -- the perfect opportunity to laugh while you learn! (A one-act version and a full-length version of this play are also available.)


    The Greek Mythology Olympiaganza (one-act)
    by Don Zolidis
      More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy
    Short, 45-55 minutes
    3 females, 3 males, 6 either
    (8-35 actors possible: 1-35 females, 1-35 males)
    $45.00 per performance; $7.99 per book

    Two battling narrators attempt to cover the entirety of Greek mythology using audience participation, cross-dressing, and general theatrical insanity. Creation myths such as Pandora's Box and Cronos and the Titans jostle for space with other famous myths like Jason and the Argonauts (the original Super Friends). Culminating in a heart-pounding, five-minute, two-actor version of The Iliad, this fast-paced, free-wheeling play is wild, silly, and a complete blast for all ages. (A full-length version and an Iliad! only version of this play are also available.)
    "The Greek Mythology Olympiaganza (one-act)" by Don Zolidis. The Greek Mythology Olympiaganza (one-act), Golden West High School, Visalia, California (2009).


    High School Musi-pocalypse by Don Zolidis   More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy
    Short, 35-45 minutes
    5 females, 4 males, 11 either (12-40 actors possible: 3-25 females, 3-25 males)
    $40.00 per performance; $7.99 per book

    When hunky star basketball player Cory and gorgeous smart girl Alejandra are chosen to star in Miss Farkus' winter musical, their story seems suspiciously similar to a certain popular film...and one lawyer won't stand for it. But a potential lawsuit is the least of the cast's problems: money is running out, and the depressing script doesn't seem likely to generate sales. Luckily, an Ancient Mayan exchange student has written a blockbuster musical disaster -- and it's guaranteed to be the most volcanic, destructive, and lucrative musical any high school has ever seen.


    An Honorary Elf
    (Or: The Girl Who Saved Christmas)
    by Don Zolidis
      More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy
    Short, 40-45 minutes
    4 females, 1 male, 9 either (14 actors possible: 3-13 females, 1-11 males)
    $35.00 per performance; $5.99 per book
    Special 33% book discount!

    After running away to the North Pole with a pair of unstable elves, Jeanna discovers that something foul is afoot in Santa's workshop. Global Warming is turning the once winter wonderland into a near flood, and a skinny, paranoid Frosty the Snowman thinks that Santa's behind the heat wave. Will Jeanna be able to uncover the truth despite threats of "re-education" from the elves? And will Frosty live to see Christmas?


    It's a Wonderful Magical Miracle on Christmas Street
    by Don Zolidis
      More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy
    Short, 12-15 minutes
    3 females, 5 males, 2 either (8-10 actors possible: 2-6 females, 4-8 males)
    $30.00 per performance; $8.99 per book

    NOTE: This play is part of an anthology called Dr. Funk's Christmas Explosion (With Demolition Derby Following).

    Angels without wings, an old miser, a "real" Santa and a mean-spirited psychiatrist appear in a hilarious spoof in which every famous Christmas movie seems to collide.

    (This play can also be performed as part of the collection Dr. Funk's Christmas Explosion (With Demolition Derby Following).)


    It's not you, it's me by Don Zolidis   More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy
    Short, 35-40 minutes
    6 females, 7 males, 1 either (5-20 actors possible: 2-10 females, 2-10 males)
    $40.00 per performance; $7.99 per book

    Whether your boyfriend is a Canadian secret agent or monk in training, or your girlfriend is a psychic or pathological liar, one thing is for sure: they are about to dump you. Exploring the painful art of breaking-up through comedic, awkwardly realistic characters, this series of wildly hilarious scenes are sure to make you feel relieved not to be the receiving end of those five fatal relationship words.


    Mall Santa Saves the Day by Don Zolidis   More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy
    Short, 10-12 minutes
    4 females, 4 males (8 actors possible: 1-7 females, 1-7 males)
    $30.00 per performance; $8.99 per book

    NOTE: This play is part of an anthology called Dr. Funk's Christmas Explosion (With Demolition Derby Following).

    Bob tries to escape his financial problems by becoming a mall santa, only to discover that the cuthroat world of holiday entertainment is no place for the faint of heart or weak of lap.

    (This play can also be performed as part of the collection Dr. Funk's Christmas Explosion (With Demolition Derby Following).)


    The Matchmakers by Don Zolidis   More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy
    Full-length, 110-120 minutes
    5 females, 8 males
    $75.00 per performance; $8.99 per book

    After a lame homecoming date at Wendy's and the dissolution of her parents' marriage, Bree begins to think that she's been cursed. When her mother declares that she's going to marry her loathsome marriage counselor, she's almost certain. And when she starts falling for that marriage counselor's geeky, awkward son, she's convinced. The Matchmakers is a wild, romantic comedy, complete with a strange clown, blind dates, and a swordfight.
    "The Matchmakers" by Don Zolidis. The Matchmakers, Pinewood Prepartory School, Summerville, South Carolina (2010).


    Miss Polly's Institute for Criminally Damaged Young Ladies Puts on a Show
    by Don Zolidis
      More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy
    Short, 30-40 minutes
    14 females, 1 male, 1 either
    (16 actors possible: 12-15 females, 1-4 males)
    $40.00 per performance; $7.99 per book

    Miss Mylenbush, the semi-hysterical head of the theatre department at Miss Polly's Institute for Criminally Damaged Young Ladies, is about to put on the greatest tragedy ever written: Hamlet. The trouble is, her actors are a bunch of teenage girls teetering between delusions of grandeur and criminally insane behavior. When her actors revolt against her autocratic direction and decide to stage the play their way, disturbing hilarity ensues.
    "Miss Polly's Institute for Criminally Damaged Young Ladies Puts on a Show" by Don Zolidis. Miss Polly's Institute for Criminally Damaged Young Ladies Puts on a Show, Jesse Bethel High School, Vallejo, California (2008).


    The Most Amazing Christmas Play Series in the Entire History of the World
    by Don Zolidis
      More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy
    Short, 40-50 minutes
    9 females, 10 males, 5 either (7-24 actors possible: 4-14 females, 3-10 males)
    $40.00 per performance; $8.99 per book

    NOTE: Each piece in this anthology can be licensed and performed separately.

    Christmas traditions are turned on their heads in this hilariously charming series of four short plays. In Clausarella, the reluctant heir to Santa's empire finds the strength to step out of his father's shadow and win true love. Kris Kringle and company get a lesson in corporate greed and worker's rights in Santa vs. The Garden Gnomes, while Revenge of the Gingerbread Boy transforms the classic confectionary tale into a vendetta soap opera. Finally, Grandma Remembers Something explores "the good old days that never were" and proves that nostalgia is a dish best served confused.

    To purchase this book of 4 plays, click "Add to Shopping Cart" above. To perform an individual play, click on its title below:

  • Santa vs. The Garden Gnomes
  • Revenge of the Gingerbread Boy
  • Grandma Remembers Something
  • Clausarella


  • The Murderous Mansion of Mr. Uno
    A deadly comedy
    by Don Zolidis
      More Info Add to Cart
    Murder Mystery/Comedy
    Short, 40-60 minutes
    5 females, 6 males (11 actors possible: 5-6 females, 5-6 males)
    $40.00 per performance; $7.99 per book

    The mysterious Mr. Uno has invited six eccentric guests to his dark and stormy mansion. When Uno winds up dead (several times over), and guests begin dying mysteriously, those remaining must uncover the murderer before it's too late. A wickedly funny parody of the traditional murder mystery, with eleven possible alternate endings voted on by the audience. Mix and match them all!
    "The Murderous Mansion of Mr. Uno" by Don Zolidis. The Murderous Mansion of Mr. Uno, Pinewood Preparatory School, Summerville, South Carolina (2007).


    Oz by Don Zolidis   More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy/Drama
    Short, 40-50 minutes
    4 females, 4 males, 4 either
    (8-16 actors possible: 4-8 females, 4-8 males)
    $40.00 per performance; $7.99 per book

    Reeling from her sister's death, Beth suddenly finds herself journeying through a world suspiciously resembling the film The Wizard of Oz. But with the yellow brick road sold to foreign investors after a financial meltdown, the Scarecrow reveling in his ignorant bliss, the Cowardly Lion acting like a paranoid sociopath, and the Tin Man embracing his emotional numbness, Beth wonders what role she plays in this classic story gone awry. A hilarious and heart-wrenching exploration of grief and perseverance on the road to acceptance.
    "Oz" by Don Zolidis. The World Premiere of Oz, Watauga Middle School, Watauga, Texas (2010).


    Revenge of the Gingerbread Boy by Don Zolidis   More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy
    Short, 10 minutes
    4 males, 2 either (5-6 actors possible: 0-2 females, 3-6 males)
    $30.00 per performance; $8.99 per book

    NOTE: This play is part of an anthology called The Most Amazing Christmas Play Series in the Entire History of the World.

    The Gingerbread Boy, son of the late Gingerbread Man, (sadly eaten by children) seeks to discovers the truth about his cursed father and finds himself mixed up in a tale of murder and intrigue involving Santa himself.

    (This play can also be performed as part of the collection The Most Amazing Christmas Play Series in the Entire History of the World.)


    Santa-Napped by Don Zolidis   More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy
    Short, 20-25 minutes
    5 females, 3 males, 4 either (12 actors possible: 2-9 females, 3-9 males)
    $35.00 per performance; $7.99 per book

    When Santa is captured by the CIA for violating the no-fly zone over American airspace, it's up to Mrs. Claus and a team of mentally unstable elves to spring into action and save Christmas. From Santa auditions and futuristic Christmas cyborgs to terrorist interrogations and mutinous reindeer, the Clauses and their elven workers must race against time break Santa out of prison and save their beloved holiday.
    "Santa-Napped" by Don Zolidis. Santa-Napped, Hellstern Middle School, Springdale, Arkansas (2009).


    Santa vs. The Garden Gnomes by Don Zolidis   More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy
    Short, 10 minutes
    2 males, 4 either (6 actors possible: 0-5 females, 1-6 males)
    $30.00 per performance; $8.99 per book

    NOTE: This play is part of an anthology called The Most Amazing Christmas Play Series in the Entire History of the World.

    After being turned away from the North Pole by Santa's elf-centered work policies, a group of garden gnomes exacts revenge.

    (This play can also be performed as part of the collection The Most Amazing Christmas Play Series in the Entire History of the World.)


    The SeussOdyssey (full-length) by Don Zolidis   More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy
    Full-length, 80-90 minutes
    12 females, 20 males, 15 either (8-60 actors possible: 4-30 females, 4-30 males)
    $75.00 per performance; $8.99 per book

    Not in the mood for homework? Let Narrator 1 and 2 take you on a literary journey, and watch as Homer's Odyssey is transformed into the style of Dr. Seuss. Complete with a singing Cyclops ("Oh the sights you can spy with only one eye!"), the slaughter of the suitors acted out with teddy bears, and the sorceress Circe serving up crew members with a side of green eggs, The SeussOdyssey is a hilarious and speedy reimagining of the classic epic. (A one-act version of this play is also available.)


    The SeussOdyssey (one-act) by Don Zolidis   More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy
    Short, 40-50 minutes
    10 females, 15 males, 10 either (8-60 actors possible: 4-30 females, 4-30 males)
    $45.00 per performance; $8.99 per book

    Not in the mood for homework? Let Narrator 1 and 2 take you on a literary journey, and watch as Homer's Odyssey is transformed into the style of Dr. Seuss. Complete with a singing Cyclops ("Oh the sights you can spy with only one eye!"), the slaughter of the suitors acted out with teddy bears, and the sorceress Circe serving up crew members with a side of green eggs, The SeussOdyssey is a hilarious and speedy reimagining of the classic epic. (A full-length version of this play is also available.)


    Snappy's Happy Half-Hour by Don Zolidis   More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy
    Short, 35-40 minutes
    8 females, 6 males, 4 either
    (18 actors possible: 0-18 females, 0-18 males)
    $40.00 per performance; $7.99 per book

    When the disgruntled cast of Snappy's Happy Half Hour quits moments before a live broadcast, it's up to the techies to save the beloved children's television show. Unfortunately, this eclectic group includes a megalomaniacal gaffer, a Hells Angel on work release, and a clinically-depressed boom operator. Can they keep the smiles on their faces and their imaginations in gear? Don't count on it. Stay tuned for hilarity and mayhem when the people behind the scenes are forced to jump in front of them.
    "Snappy's Happy Half-Hour" by Don Zolidis. Snappy's Happy Half-Hour, Wellsboro High School, Wellsboro, Pennsylvania (2007).


    Suzie Scrooge by Don Zolidis
    based on A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens
      More Info Add to Cart
    Christmas comedy
    Short, 45-50 minutes
    3 females, 7 males, 3 either (7-20 actors possible: 3-12 females, 4-15 males)
    $35.00 per performance; $5.99 per book
    Special 33% book discount!

    In this modern-day adaptation of the beloved Dickens classic, it's one year after Scrooge's miraculous transformation. Now everyone is out to take advantage of him, including the unscrupulous Cratchits. Scrooge's niece, Suzie, tries to look out for him, but instead of saving her uncle, she's visited by a series of well-meaning spirits: the ghost of her old lab partner, her dead driving instructor, and other oddities who insist on teaching her the true meaning of Christmas. But they don't quite get what they bargained for.


    A Tiny Miracle with a Fiberoptic Unicorn
    A somewhat nostalgic, sentimental comedy in two acts
    by Don Zolidis
      More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy/Drama
    Full-length, 120-130 minutes
    5 females, 3 males
    $75.00 per performance; $8.99 per book

    In the winter of 1986, thirteen-year-old Louis vows to kiss the love of his life, the quirky theater queen Carolyn, before Christmas. Standing in his way are the forces of puberty, his big-haired vitriolic older sister, his anal-retentive mother, and his eternally amused father. The surprise arrival of both grandmothers, each crazy in their own way, throws the family into turmoil and cracks Louis' world wide open.


    The Trial of Santa by Don Zolidis   More Info Add to Cart
    Christmas Comedy
    Short, 35-40 minutes
    5 females, 3 males, 15 either (13-23 actors possible: 5-20 females, 3-18 males)
    $35.00 per performance; $7.99 per book

    The trial of the century: Santa Claus (aka Kris Kringle) v. Emily Worthington (aka bratty nine-year-old girl). In the TV courtroom of Judge Trudy, Santa is charged with delivering the wrong present on Christmas Day. Will Santa be convicted of this heinous crime? Or will Santa's Elven lawyer prove beyond a doubt that Emily was naughty, not nice?


    The World's Largest Rodent by Don Zolidis   More Info Add to Cart
    Comedy
    Full-length, 100-110 minutes
    3 females, 3 males (6-21 actors possible: 3-16 females, 3-16 males)
    $75.00 per performance; $8.99 per book

    Billy's life was pushed to the brink of insanity when his father disappeared and his mother slipped into a catatonic state after a failed suicide attempt. His older sister, Meg, has enough on her hands with a job at Wal-Mart to pay off medical bills and a Latin lover who is determined to teach Billy how to be a man. Billy's only friends are a home schooled lesbian evangelist named Chastity whom he desperately lusts after and a large, magical talking capybara, the world's largest rodent. Together, they must find a way to revive Billy's mother and save Billy's world.
    "The World's Largest Rodent" by Don Zolidis. The World's Largest Rodent, The Victory Theatre, Burbank, California (2008). Photo: Tim Sullens
    Reviews
    "Zolidis' delightfully twisted and often bleak black comedy marks the local debut of a most promising playwright...raucously funny and truly fearless."
    --Entertainment Today
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